This One is For You Mamas
A few months ago, towards the end of last year, I was invited to speak at a Mom’s group of a local church. The following is an excerpt from that talk:
I am a mother of three grown children or as I like to call them, adults. They were very young when I surrendered my life to the Lordship of Jesus, so I relearned parenting from the creator of families instead of the world. I see them as His proof of concept. Mainly since I parented them the way he parents me.
Along the way He taught me a few things that I think are important:
1. We are not raising children; the goal is to raise adults. If we parent with that in mind we will teach them to handle disappointment by saying NO. We will teach them the value of money by making them earn it. We will teach them patience by making them wait for things. We will teach them the joy of working hard for something they want. We will teach them kindness matters, the truth sometimes hurt, and the world doesn’t revolve around them.
2. Let your children see you walk out your faith because He who trusts in the Lord will never be put to shame. I have bet my life on this truth! I have always been open and honest about our needs, trials, my prayers, and even my past with my children. I let them in on my sanctification process and I let them see God at work. When He came through for us, and He always did, we celebrated as a family. When I was wrong I admitted it so it taught them to do the same.
3. Hypocrisy breeds contempt. If you teach it, then live it too. We must live out the things we say we believe or our children will come to despise it. I believe that God is more pleased with someone who knows one truth of His Word and walks it out, than those who know His word inside and out but don’t live any of it. Being able to memorize scripture is great. Renewing your mind with it and letting it change you is better. Far better. Let your kids see you walk in faith. Ask them to pray for the impossible with you. Make them a part of what God is doing on this earth. I’ve seen God answer my full-fledged, crazy, impossible prayers of faith but honestly, I think it absolutely thrills Him more to get to answer these types of prayers when our children ask.
4. Mamas, do not break your sons, they aren’t horses. Allow them to be the wild, daring, manly men God created them to be. When setting rules always remember, they are only meant to guide and protect never to oppress or control.
5. It’s okay to say NO. To your child, to your family, to friends. The success of your Christian walk is not based on how busy you are, no matter your spiritual gift. It is based on your belief in God’s Word. There is a significant difference between having it all and doing it all.
I’m going to say three words… simple, peaceful, content. Be honest do these words describe your life as a Christian?
Simple, peaceful, content.
How about another three? Adventurous, Abundant, Joyous.
These should too. Believe Jesus when he says this is the life he came to give you.
6. Ask God who He says your children are, what He calls them, so you can view them as he does. This helped me so much once I knew what God called these children He had given me. I realized that the enemy was attacking my kids in the very area that God had called them strong. I would never have seen this otherwise and known how to pray. Get alone with God, ask Him what He calls these little people He has entrusted to you. And thank him for His trust too.
This next one is incredibly important.
7. Do not parent from fear. Fear is not of God, common sense yes but don’t instill fear in your children. Don’t convince them to obey out of fear. If their fear of you wears off, and it most likely will, you’ll never get them to obey you again. Even more importantly, if they don’t properly learn how to obey you, it makes it that much harder to know how to obey God.
If you walk in fear, worry, or anxiety take authority over it now. Bind it in the name of Jesus. You have this authority. In the garden of Eden, God gave Adam and Eve dominion over the earth. Satan deceived them in order to steal it from them, from us. Jesus bought it back. His death, burial, and resurrection were payment in full. Are you in Christ? Then you have the authority to bind the spirits that torment you and your children. Ask God to name it if you are unsure, and then bind it in Jesus’ name, Tell it, it has no power or authority, Jesus is Lord over all. Jesus is your Lord, and you command it to leave now in the name of Jesus Christ. Believe that you have that authority. This is a critical truth that Satan does not want you to grasp.
One last thought, since I watch my grandchildren three days a week. Over the past two years I have been reminded of the loneliness of mothers of youngsters, babies and toddlers. It’s hard, but I don’t need to tell you that. Can I suggest we use it as a time to pray bold prayers over these children? Don’t despise this time. See the importance of it. Their childhood is so much shorter than it feels as you’re living it. Ask any mom that just sent her baby off to college, it goes by so fast. I can almost guarantee that you will long for these days in the future. Don’t rush through it, take your time and do it right.
Raise good people, Mama, the world needs them.